Unfriending Your Ex in Divorce

With just the click of a button, we can unfriend people from Facebook, ejecting them from our daily lives without a second thought. Wouldn’t it be nice if you could just “unfriend” your Ex in real time the same way you can on Facebook?

As appealing as deleting your ex from your life sounds, it’s often just not possible, especially if you share children together. However there are ways you can alter your “privacy settings” in your life to minimize contact and interaction after divorce. Here are some suggestions on how distance yourself from your Ex:

1. Change any mutual passwords to your accounts. Online social networking sites keep you connected to others, but it’s also a window into your Ex’s world that you don’t want or need to see anymore.

2. Keep your private life private. You are under no obligation to share your personal life with your Ex. While you may be used to sharing every deep, dark secret with this person, things are different now with divorce. Keep your personal experiences to yourself and deflect any inquiries with short and concise answers.

3. Reduce the amount of texting and emailing you engage in with your Ex. While this might be necessary while dealing with legal issues, or to make arrangements for the children, brief phone conversations are less intimate and there is no opportunity for misunderstanding or misinterpreted language.

4. Be careful when speaking to mutual friends. You may have some of the same friends as your Ex that play both sides after the divorce. Be aware that anything you disclose has the potential to get back to your Ex. You can make it clear to your friends that everything is to be kept confidential, but the best security will come from not sharing any information that you would not ultimately want your Ex to know.

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